ONE MORE STEP

today was excruciating and very overwhelming but I DID IT !!!! - at least began....
the Y program is all on machines.... huge big over powering machines.... one whole room for cardio and another for strength....
everything is done on a computer for each person so the "program " is individualized....
I have never been on any kind of machine and have no strength at all so of course am at ground zero...all the machines are programmed to my "code" for me....
just getting on them is pretty intimidating so i was more than anxious .....
i only got to do 2 things today -
ride the stationery bike - a huge contraption - the first one I didn't have the strength to get it going so got to do an easier one.....I did it for 12 of the 20 minutes that they'd like.... which i thought was a miracle.
then i did a leg press machine - where you push and pull the legs to lift some kind of weights....
I did 10 lbs for the 6 times they set it for.... ! another miracle.
most of the other people are waaaaaaaaaaaay ahead of me - did more machines etc.... but i'm determined to ignore them..
it seems like a really long road - 12 weeks - 2x a week but they promise it will help me get back on my feet.....
my anxiety level was very high and i shook a lot and am sore tonite.....BUT I DID IT and am VERY PROUD of this step i took.....
my ipod helped a lot.....
it also gets me through the radiation every day.....
Thank you steve jobs !!!!! and christopher.....