waking up with apprehension
mind knows it's OK
body shaking with anxiety
blood test first
count is "good" so treatment can go ahead
meet with the DR.
sweet gentle soul who tells me
"you're doing this...I'm proud of you...
and i really like the flower on your hat...."
then on to the BIG room with BIG chairs
women and men circled for healing treatment
hooked up
prisoner of the bags and dripping
i try to settle in - shaking and weepy
holding on to Marilyn
she's walked this path herself
the nurse passed the kleenex
as the tears wash over me
i tell her no.....
i need the tears to wash away
things buried and stuck
deep in my body, heart and soul....
IV hook ups begin
good veins, the nurse says
it's working well
anti nausea drip, saline,
andriomycin and cytoxin, more saline
nasty, ugly, drugs
and with each drip
i try to honor the healing they bring
in ridding my body of cancer cells
the drips seem to take forever
my ipod distracts me
and brings more tears
the music calling my
body and soul to dance
and for now
i cannot....
mind knows it's OK
body shaking with anxiety
blood test first
count is "good" so treatment can go ahead
meet with the DR.
sweet gentle soul who tells me
"you're doing this...I'm proud of you...
and i really like the flower on your hat...."
then on to the BIG room with BIG chairs
women and men circled for healing treatment
hooked up
prisoner of the bags and dripping
i try to settle in - shaking and weepy
holding on to Marilyn
she's walked this path herself
the nurse passed the kleenex
as the tears wash over me
i tell her no.....
i need the tears to wash away
things buried and stuck
deep in my body, heart and soul....
IV hook ups begin
good veins, the nurse says
it's working well
anti nausea drip, saline,
andriomycin and cytoxin, more saline
nasty, ugly, drugs
and with each drip
i try to honor the healing they bring
in ridding my body of cancer cells
the drips seem to take forever
my ipod distracts me
and brings more tears
the music calling my
body and soul to dance
and for now
i cannot....
It is such a secret place, the land of tears. ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince
1 comment:
...and you're doing it... it's hard, it sucks, it's awful... but you're doing it! Keep up the good work! Three down...only 5 to go..5 doesn't seem as big as 8 did... you can do it! Much love!
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