the lymphedema journey continues

this post is probably goiong to be TMI (too much information)for some of you as i describe my visit with the RN who runs the lymphedema clinic in Morgan Hill (about 45 minutes away.)
I was there for 2 hours to get fitted for some kind of bra or garment that would provide compression to my very swollen and fluid filled breast. Her first suggestion
which was heavy black quilted fabric in this style, i turned down as something i know i would not wear.....
since this condition is a lifetime achievement with no cure, it doesn't make a whole lot of difference, i hope..........
we then proceeded to try over a dozen different styles of post mastectomy bras that have pockets in them into which i will insert a piece of heavy quilted garment similar (but a little smaller) to thisthat will provide compression.....this is a less satisfactory but for me more realistic solution.... so much for lots of my clothes that will just not look or fit right in this get up......i got 2 so that i don't have to wear the same one every day........
i then was fitted for the arm sleeve and glove
which i will wear during the day -all day and wear the heavy black one that i've been wearing daily only at nite....
it was a horrific couple of hours accompanied by quite a few meltdowns...
it's all pretty overwhelming......
add to the trauma the fact that insurance pays for none of these treatments so charging $400 later ( and that's without a custom glove which she recommended) the trauma intensifies.....
if i had had a mastectomy, it all would be covered!!!!! so much for our health care system......
i am worn out and feeling pretty low.....
tomorrow the sun will shine and i will breathe a little easier.... i hope sleep comes quickly tonite....